Author Unknown, but I think he had to be an Army NCO!
A tourist walked into a pet store and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, a Command Sergeant Major (CSM) from the local airfield walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll take a 6114 monkey, please." The man nodded, went to a cage at the side of the store and took out a monkey. He put a collar and leash on the animal and handed it the CSM saying, "That'll be $1,000." The CSM paid and left with the monkey.
Surprised, the tourist went to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did that one cost so much?" The shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that 6114 monkey, he can rig aircraft flight controls, score 300 on the Army APFT, set up a perimeter defense and perform the duties of any warrant officer with no back talk or complaints. It's well worth the money."
The tourist spotted a monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive--$10,000! What does it do?"
"Oh, that one is a "Maintenance Supervisor" monkey; it can instruct at all levels of maintenance, supervise maintenance at the unit, intermediate, and Depot level, and even do most of the paperwork. A very useful monkey indeed," replied the shopkeeper.
The tourist looked around a little longer and found a third monkey in a cage. The price tag read, "$50,000". The shocked tourist exclaimed, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What in the world could it do?"
"Well, I've never actually seen him do anything but drink beer and play with his -- well you know. But his papers say he's a Pilot.